(From left to right: me, Dixie, Jessie, and Kim)Picture getting in your car and starting it up. In virtually every instance, when you step on the gas, the car moves forward. When you brake, it slows and stops. When you turn the wheel to the right, the car turns right, and, of course, when you turn left, the car goes left. Unless something breaks or goes terribly wrong, the car does what you direct it to do probably 100 percent of the time. Now, suppose you expect the car to do what you direct it to, but there are no guarantees. When you step on the accelerator, it may move forward... or not. When you turn it to the left, it might go left, but, as I mentioned above, there are no guarantees. In the past, the car always responded as you expected, but the next time it might not. That, my friends, is what a horse show is all about. As my wife and now I often say, "Horse showing is a sport in which the ball has a mind of its own."
From 8:00 this morning (up at 6) until about 7:30 this evening, I was at a horse show; that's a long day. I am the "adviser" for my high school's equestrian team, which is new this year. I put the word "adviser" in quotes, as I don't have much advice to give. Horses are not my strong point even though we own three and my daughter rides. If you are not a horse person, I may know more than you do, but if you are, I am severely lacking. What I decided I can do is give you, the non-horse people, a look at what I know and what it's like to attend a horse show.
As all of what follows is equally important, all items are labeled #1. (#1) Always watch where you step. Horses don't excuse themselves and then wander off to some isolated corner to, uh, relieve themselves; no, where they stand or happen to be passing through at any moment is where it happens. If people did the same, their workday would be oh, so much more productive with no bathroom breaks. (#1) When passing behind a horse, give it a wide berth. At any given moment, a horse may (and often does) release prodigious piles of, uh, horse, uh, "puckey" (no dictionary meaning captures what I really mean there, but I am sure you can figure it out). You don't want to be standing there when it happens. Also, some horse can kick out or step on you - something else you don't want to experience. (#1) Be prepared to stand around or sit around a lot. In a typical show of perhaps up to nine or ten hours, the actual riding time of the rider you go to see may be measured in minutes. (#1) The judge is the judge, and what happens happens. If a rider makes a mistake or does a perfect job, the judge may see the former but not the latter (or vice-versa). If the former, get over it or, if the latter, enjoy the moment. The opposite may happen the next time. (#1) Be prepared for "weather." Today was a miserable 39 degrees with a wind chill that made it feel like zero. There are other days in which one bakes. Rain and mud (mixed with horse puckey) are the worst IMHO, although today was no prizewinner. (#1) If you think owning a house is expensive, when you get into horses, the house looks cheap. (on the other hand, and in all fairness, someone once said the best place to raise a child is in the horse ring. There is much truth there [see #1 that follows]. The money we spend is truly an investment in responsibility and character. So far, our investment has paid off dearly!) Finally, (#1) Horse people are often among the best people in the world - they are friendly, comfortable, and generous. In one personal case, a person we had never seen before let my daughter ride her horse to compete when we had problems with ours. (Of course, in any large group of people, there are bound to be a few spoiled brats, so keep your eyes open - you can usually tell who they are pretty quickly.) I am sure there are more things to offer, but I need to unwind before bed. Today really was a long day... but worth every second.
Later.
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