Liar, Liar....

I do not lie. Many (most?) people as they go through life, see lying is an easy way to get in or get out of something. While he may or may not have said it, Mark Twain is credited with the quote: "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything" (meaning it's a lot harder trying to remember what you said to whom rather than just telling the truth where your story won't change).

How honest am I? I remember one day at work I spilled toner trying to install a new cartridge (that stuff is worse than glitter). No one was around, and I just could have left, but I didn't. I called the office and told them what I had done. Yes, I am that honest.

Through the years, I do remember telling my students early in the school year (using an appropriate facial expression and deep gravitas) that if they lied to me once and got caught, it would be a long time before I ever trusted them again. Along the way, that resulted often in my asking, "Did you do that?" The response was usually a meek, "Yes." And that solved a lot of problems that could have easily grown like Pinocchio's nose.

I have zero respect for liars. "By a lie, a man... annihiliates his dignity as a man." (Immanuel Kant). Is that so hard to understand? I ran into one former student who told me he had been in the army. I asked what his MOS (Military Occupational Specialty) had been. He didn't know what I meant. Bus-ted! Stolen valor? I learned he was a pathological liar and to trust nothing he said. Sad situation. 

In school, I was known for my frequent truly-true "stories" (one girl once told me she thought I'd really be fun at a party because I was so random and know so much (fooled her, didn't I). From the student perspective, every story was time away from whatever we were doing. When a work we were reading reminded me of something in my past, I'd put down the book and begin.

What they didn't know is virtually every story actually had a point that advanced and supported the school's Mission statement: "Together we challenge one another to develop and demonstrate the attitudes, skills, and knowledge essential to attaining excellence in self, family and community." (I added the Oxford comma just because, well, that's what I do.)

I had been where the kids were, but they haven't been where I was. I learned and grew through my experiences through the years and am pretty happy with the person I have become. I wanted them to know I was human and made mistakes along the way - that  I made decisions that I look back on and regret (but learned from).

Anyhow, telling the truth is difficult. I Googled 'truth,' and I was presented with a list of 1,540,000,000 hits. Truth is a major topic in philosophy and has been discussed for thousands of years. The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy notes "the proble

Perhaps defining truth is much like Supreme Court's Justice Stweart Potter's famous comment regarding pornography: " I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description["hard-core pornography'], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that." 

I can't accept people who lie. I am surprised by those who can and do on a daily basis.

Oops, this is getting too heady, so if you take anything away from this, it's "Tell the truth."

It Wasn't Always that Way...

Way back, I was told that one of the reasons I was hired for my teaching position teaching English at PAHS (Plymouth AREA High School) was because I was... well, different (I am).

I came from a different place (The Flatlands outside of Boston) than many of the other teachers, I went to different schools (again Emerson College in Boston), I had a host of different experiences, and I had a strong sense of character and morals. It wasn't always that way.

True confession time. One of the first paperbacks I ever bought was called "The Best of Sick Jokes" (and they certainly were - absolutely inappropriate today). The book first came out in 1958, but I am guessing I was probably 14 or 15 when I got my copy a few years later, and the sicker the joke the better (at least so we thought then [it's a boy thing]). I would tell adults a shocking joke or two, and they would glare disapprovingly, but I could see them stifling a smile. Yeah, I was naughty! 

I maintained that penchant and became known for my offbeat sense of humor, but as my high school years unfolded and college neared, I discovered romantic comedies at the movies. Because growing young people are constantly trying on different faces to find one that fits, the new male image I began to emulate was that of a wise-cracking, suave, sophisticated gentleman (Cary Grant and Rock Hudson in particular with a sprinkling of James Garner, Jack Lemmon, James Coburn, and even Frank Sinatra mixed in). Audrey Hepburn and Doris Day [and a host of others] were often their quarry. Both personas carried me through my college years.

Everything changed when I began my teaching career. I learned quickly that almost any straying off the conservative path had consequences. For over thirty years, I had to watch what I said. Probably once or twice a year, I'd mutter something in jest only to realize as soon I said, whatever it was, I had messed up. I prayed for no phone calls from home or summons to the principal's office. Overall, I lucked out.

Today, even though I have been out of the classroom for over a decade, I still watch what I say. I come across as a prig (prig - look it up). My few close friends know the real me, but for the most part to most people, I seem pretty boring. When I meet someone shopping, it's "Hey, how are you doing? What are you up to?, etc, and then we move on with me often wondering, "Who was that?"

Anyhow, I found out  suffer from Witzelsucht , which consists of excessive facetiousness and inappropriate or pointless humor - someone who jokes at inappropriate times and places. I have controlled it so few people have seen it (apologies to those who have). I will hear a 'trigger word,' and a joke emerges. My poor wife and daughter have heard the same jokes too many times. It's kind of like when Moe Howard or Lou Costello hears the words, "Niagara Falls."

Forewarned is forearmed. Make sure you offer no trigger words. 

A tip of the Keyboard

A tip of the keyboard goes to the Ever-effervescent Miss Jessica  who has rekindled my interest in blogging.

I began a new one, but we decided I should focus more and continue with the one I have going. There's a lot of 'stuff' there, but it's all over the place.

After a few new entries, I will publicize what I am doing, and, if people like it, they can share it and start to build a following.

Now, for some serious thought....

Be back soon.

Snapshots - Three Students.

A snapshot is my remembering a moment in time - something that made an impression.

Things were different from where I was brought up. Not Better, Not Worse, Just Different.

(1) My ex was also a high school English teacher in rural New Hampshire. She tried her hand at dog breeding. One night the Shar-Pei had puppies, and as one who always did the right thing, she stayed up all night making sure the delivery went well. The next day she made it to class (it's often more trouble to just go in to work than stay home).

She announced to the class that she had been up all night delivering and taking care of the new puppies and that if she seemed a bit out of it, that was why. A student raised his hand and said, "Do you want us to drown them for you?"

(2) One girl had been acting up in several classes, so a meeting was called to compare notes and discuss what could be done - to see what strategies might help her. One of the first suggestions was
to call her parents. Someone responded immediately: "Not a good idea; her father will beat the shit out of her!"

(3) Finally, a rare compliment. During one class, two girls in the back of the room were having their own animated conversation. Before I could say anything, one girl loudly said to the other, "Shut up!" I responded, "Don't say that! My daughter is four-years-old and knows not to say that!" The girl said, Yeah, well look who she has for a father!" That felt good.